????自從我的保潔機器人碾過我的腳面，還弄壞了我的鞋，我就一直在想，機器人到底能不能代替人類完成工作。我尤其認為我所從事的管理工作還是安全的。即便職場面臨著機器人入侵的威脅，但管理這種工作還不是機器人在頭上畫一個笑臉就能取代的，而他們的笑臉背后，只是肩膀上的一個金屬物體，當然他們的肩膀也不是真正的肩膀。

????但現在我卻不那么確定了。因為據《紐約時代》（New York Times ）報道，麻省理工學院（MIT）的兩位經濟學家近日表示：“自動化的發展速度正在加快，而且機器人正在向新的職場領域進軍，比如過去我們一向認為電腦無法代替的白領工作。”換句話說，可能讓我的工作不保的，不僅僅有并購、重組、以及其他從事管理顧問行業的同行，現在還多了個機器人。

????你知道嗎，我并不認為目前或不遠的將來就會跑出個機器人來取代我的工作。我們來分析一下情況。

????首先，機器人能夠長時間在高壓下工作，即使最后高層管理者把興趣轉移到別的事情上，項目無疾而終，它們也不會沮喪嗎？我想應該不會。機器人不會感到失望或是生氣。他們不用吃不用喝，也不會倒在沙發上睡著了，甚至都不用回家！因此，這一輪比拼，機器人得一分。

????機器人在開會時能夠不打盹、不涂涂畫畫、不搞小動作嗎？當然可以。但是機器人是否能在會上提出觀點鮮明的真知灼見，從大家的討論中提取要點，從而確保它的發言條理一致，而且不招高管層討厭呢？或許可以做得到，但是不會向你我那樣用謹小慎微或派頭十足的方式提出來。

????機器人能像我們一樣談笑風生、妙語連珠地讓氣氛活躍起來嗎？不能。不過話說回來，機器人的頭腦里可以儲存一大堆笑話，在大家陷入沉默的時候丟出來一兩個。這些在電腦控制下講出的笑話甚至可能比人類講出來的更好笑，尤其是與我知道的笑話相比。

????那拍馬屁呢？我想在這一點上我還是有優勢的。當我從電梯出來，電梯對我說“祝您愉快”時，我認為這句話毫無意義。因此那些能把領導拍得心花怒放的工作可能還是安全的。

????那么管理技能呢？當下屬報怨、要求晉升、要求指導、要求情感關注的時候，一個安卓機器人能耐心傾聽嗎？當然能。老實說，機器人干這個比我更輕松。

????當然，機器人不能嘮閑嗑兒。比如我就想象不出一個銷售員機器人是什么樣的。而且機器人也不能和同事一起啃香腸三明治，也不能在下班后和同事喝上一杯聯絡感情。當然你也可以設計出一個更蠢一點、行事更不合禮節一點的機器人。我想一個喝得醉醺醺的機器人可能比一半以上我認識的人更有意思。

????Ever since my Roomba carpet-cleaning robot ran over my foot and masticated my shoe, I have been wary of robots as substitutes for actual working persons. I particularly felt that my job in management was safe from the incursion of machines with friendly faces painted on the front of their heads, or whatever you call the metal constructions atop their shoulders, if those are indeed shoulders.

????Now I'm not so sure. Apparently there are two economists from MIT who believe, as the New York Times put it recently, "that the pace of automation is accelerating and that robotics is pushing into new areas of the workforce like white-collar jobs that were previously believed to be beyond the scope of computers." In other words, my position is now challenged not only by mergers, restructurings, and the incursions of management consultants who have to earn their bread and butter by eliminating mine, but also by robots.

????Well, you know what? I don't think there's a robot alive or on the horizon who could do my job. Let's look at it.

????Could a robot work long hours under intense pressure on a project only to see it evaporate when senior management turns its gaze to other enthusiasms? Well ... I guess so. Robots don't get frustrated or angry. They don't have drinks with dinner and fall asleep on the couch, either. They don't even need to go home! So ... fine. Chalk one up for the robots.

????Can a robot sit in long meetings without dozing, doodling, or disgracing itself? Okay, yes again. Ah, but could it contribute salient observations to secure its status, drawing on past discussions to make sure that what it said was organizationally consistent and not obnoxious to senior management? Probably. But not with the subtlety or panache that you or I would bring to the job.

????Can a robot interject a witticism or bon mot that adroitly lightens the mood? No! On the other hand, it could be stocked with a bank of jokes to deploy during silences. Such cybernetic jests would probably be even funnier than when cracked by a human being, especially the ones I know.

????What about sucking up? I think I have the edge here. I know that when an elevator says, "Have a nice day," it means nothing to me. So it's possible that jobs that support executives with big egos are still safe.

????How about management skills? Could an android listen to the whining, requests for advancement, and entreaties for guidance and affection that pour from subordinates? Sure it could. Frankly, all that would be easier on the robot than it is on me.

????Certainly, a robot cannot schmooze. I can't imagine a sales robot, for instance. And it won't be able to enjoy a sausage sandwich with the guys, or forge a bond with its colleagues over a vat of martinis after work. Although I guess you could program a robot to get progressively more stupid and inappropriate. A drunk robot would probably be more entertaining than half the guys I know.