????60歲的彼得?施維澤是紐約市人道猶太教城市教會（The City Congregation for Humanistic Judaism）的教士。他在大學的時候對猶太研究產生了興趣，于是決定在改革運動中成為一名猶太教教士，盡管他從未考慮過自己對上帝的信仰。但后來，作為一名主持葬禮的年輕教士，經常要背誦第23章圣歌，他發現自己再也忍受不了讓哀悼者們從上帝那里尋找慰藉。因為他認為在那樣的時刻，這些根本不能給人們帶來慰藉。

????施維澤回憶道：“我們心中有痛苦。我們需要哀悼。我們現在很難受。這是一場悲劇。這樣的生活太虛偽，我已經不是我自己了。于是我說：‘我必須誠實；我不能再干這種事了。’我必須找到一條新的道路。”

????他在一家出版社工作了一段時間，后來又成為一名社會工作者，終于他有機會接觸到人道猶太教。這個教派接受各種不同的信仰，重視誠實。于是他在現在的這個教會自愿擔任教士，隨著教會的規模越來越大，他也得到了一份帶薪的職位。施維澤表示，由于自己曾經的經歷，他感覺對于那些質疑自己信仰的會眾來說，他是一位更富有同情心、更有效的教士。

????他說：“我是一位無神論者，這一點我不想隱瞞。重要的并不是我們不信什么，而是我們相信什么……我相信人類有面對各種事情的能力。我相信人類的適應能力。我相信幽默、勇氣、思考。我相信社區的力量。這些非常強大，甚至超越了許多東西。”????

????而對于卡洛斯?格林，皮鞋里潮濕的硬紙板預示著他的生活跌入了低谷，于是他和妻子做出了重大改變，來減少開支，償還債務，避免申請破產。他們賣掉了帶精裝修地下室、共有五間臥室的夢幻家園，搬到一棟很小的兩居室內。兩個兒子共用一個房間，愛犬隨便找地方睡。他們節衣縮食，用了三年時間，終于還清了信用卡的債務。格林夫婦發誓，再也不要重蹈覆轍。他們再次搬家的時候，買了一棟在自己承受范圍之內的房子。而且，他開始參加公司提供的免費研討會和培訓機會，提高自己的預算與個人理財能力。

????十多年后，格林表示，他感覺當時的經歷對他的金融服務職業提供了幫助。他說：“我把客戶當作真正的人來看待。對于他們的經歷，我更能感同身受。這讓我有更好的視角來提出水平更高的問題，確保客戶為退休生活制定可靠的儲蓄規劃。”

????實際上，達特納表示，在評估一個言行不一的職業人士時，應該問一個關鍵的問題，即他是偶爾出現了一兩次疏忽，還是他始終在違反自己倡導其他人堅持的規則——而且沒有任何改進的跡象。如果是后者，這樣的人非常虛偽，自然應該敬而遠之。但如果是前者，他們或許有更多的見解和智慧。畢竟，如果一名飲食專家從來沒有為堅持一個飲食計劃而努力過，你會相信他的減肥建議嗎？

????達特納說：“我寧愿相信親自經歷過同樣問題的人；這會讓他們更加可信。”（財富中文網）

????譯者：劉進龍/汪皓??

????Peter Schweitzer, 60, rabbi of The City Congregation for Humanistic Judaism in New York City, grew interested in Judaic studies in college and decided to become a rabbi in the Reform movement, despite the fact that he had never really given his beliefs in God much consideration. But later, as a young rabbi officiating at funerals, where the 23rd Psalm was standard fare, he found he could no longer bear to tell mourners to find comfort in a God that was anything but caring in those moments.

????"There is pain. We do need to moan. We are upset right now. This is a tragedy," Schweitzer recalls. "It was getting too hypocritical for me to be me. I said, 'I have to be honest; I can't do this any more.' I have to find a new path."

????He worked in publishing for a while and became a social worker before finding his way to Humanistic Judaism, in which many different beliefs are accepted and a premium is put on honesty. He volunteered as a rabbi in his current congregation before it grew large enough to offer him a paid position. Schweitzer says he feels he's a more compassionate and effective rabbi to members of his congregation who question their beliefs because of the path he took.

????"I'm clearly an atheist. I don't wave it around," he says. "It's not what we don't believe, it's what we do believe that matters ... I believe in human ability to face things. I believe in resilience. I believe in humor, courage, thinking. I believe in the strength of community. It's very, very powerful and it transcends lots of things."?

????As for Carlos Greene, after hitting bottom with soggy cardboard in his shoes, he and his wife overhauled their lives to reduce expenses, pay down their debt, and avoid filing for bankruptcy. They sold their five-bedroom dream home with a finished basement and moved into a small two-bedroom townhouse where their two sons shared a room and the dog slept wherever she could. It took nearly three years of scrimping and saving to pay down the credit cards, and both Greenes vowed never to fall back into that hole. The next time they moved, they spent less on a house than they could afford. And he began taking the free seminars and educational opportunities that his firm provided, to improve his budgeting and personal finance skills.

????More than a decade later, Greene says he feels that the experience has helped him in his work as a financial services professional. "I see our clients and our customers as real people. I have a lot more compassion for where they are," he says. "It gives me greater perspective on asking the next-level questions to make sure they're in a good space to truly be able to save for retirement."

????Indeed, Dattner says that when evaluating a professional who doesn't practice what he preaches, the key question is to ask whether he slips up once or twice, or if he perennially violates the rules he says you must follow -- with no sign of reforming. The latter individual is a hypocrite who should be avoided, but the former might actually have more insight and wisdom to offer. After all, would you want a dietician telling you how to lose weight if that person had never struggled to stick to an eating plan?

????"I'd rather have somebody who has the issue themselves; that makes them much more credible," Dattner says.????????????