????海因斯也給出了類似的建議：“如果有人幫你只是為了和你上床，那么無論如何，你都沒有這個義務，拒絕他們也完全用不著愧疚。”

????米斯納建議在這種情況下提高警惕。確定你沒有在和對方調情，也沒有利用性別特征展開交流。他說：“這么干并不真誠。但如果你真的希望與人建立業務關系，你需要做到真誠。”

????他也對會面的另一方提出了建議。畢竟有時候如果有浪漫的進展也是件好事，關鍵在于區分這其中的差別。要做到這點，需要首先建立良好的互動關系。米斯納稱：“男性都傾向于突然襲擊”，常常忘記了要先打好基礎。

????不要一來就勾搭同事，先試著了解對方。他說：“關系確立之后，接下來的步驟自然就水到渠成。”他當然知道這點，因為他自己就是在自己的網絡公司BNI舉辦的領導力培訓中遇到了后來的妻子。（財富中文網）

????譯者：嚴匡正??

????Hines offers similar advice, "If someone offers to help you and their motivation for doing so is that they were hoping to sleep with you, that doesn't in any way obligate you to sleep with them or feel guilty if you don't."

????Misner recommends exercising caution in such scenarios. Be sure you are not flirting with the person or using your sexuality to interact. "It's not very authentic," he says. "And if you really want to build business relationships with people, you need to be authentic."

????He also offers advice to the person on the other end of the conversation. After all, sometimes a romantic advance will be welcome; the key is identifying the difference. To do that, you need to build a relationship. "Men have a tendency to cold call," often forgetting to lay the groundwork, Misner says.

????Instead of hitting on a colleague right off the bat, get to know the person. "When you've established a relationship, then taking it to the next step may be more obvious for you," he says. He would know -- he met his wife at a Leadership Training held by his networking organization, BNI.