????然后，我想到了頭一天晚上我的丈夫、兄弟和我因為高興，喝酒助興，花費遠遠超出了21.99美元。為什么不能讓我的孩子也開心一下？

????事實或許讓人難以接受，但除非我愿意讓我們大家都過清苦的日子（但我們努力工作不正是為了過得好一點嗎？），否則根本就沒辦法教孩子和我一樣的節儉，當年我為了省下每罐雞湯1.5美元的錢，曾經自己燉雞骨頭做高湯。如果我現在買的是密保諾（Ziploc）的品牌保鮮袋，孩子們將來也會買密保諾保鮮袋，而不是普通保鮮袋。

????不過，這也不全是壞事，我不知道我能省就省的觀念，究竟是因為節儉是一個優秀品質，還是因為看多了個人理財資料。它有它的好處：我除了按揭貸款外從未有過其他債務。但也有弊端，我在慈善捐款和禮物饋贈方面總是有所節制。

????由于請人照看孩子的費用不菲，在請人方面我總是能拖就拖，結果導致我無法全身心追求職業發展，還給我們的婚姻帶來了很大的壓力。我也不愿在我的事業方面進行投資，比如雇幾個助手或進行付費宣傳，因為我總是告訴自己，我自己做，就可以把錢省下來。可是有時事情做得并不如意，更多情況下根本就沒做。

????我想告訴孩子們，如果不是為了實現更大的目標，為節省而節省并不是一項美德。金錢具有強大的力量，但并不是因為數目，而是因為金錢能做到很多事情。有時候，我們必須要承擔風險，有時候面對重要的事情該花就得花。

????其中也包括孩子們的快樂。我不確定將來等他們工作時，決定經濟的因素是什么。必須得為未來做好計劃，但如果未來不可知，也可以適當享受現在。我試圖在省吃儉用和鋪張浪費之間找到適當的平衡點——使金錢褪去浮華，成為我們實現人生夢想的工具?？上У氖沁@個道理很難在玩具區給孩子講明白。

????勞拉?范德卡姆是財富網站（Fortune.com）的定期供稿人，上周她撰寫的新書《最幸福的人：金錢世界的收支之道》（All the Money in the World: What the Happiest People Know About Getting and Spending）已經上架銷售。

????譯者：老榆木

????Then I remembered that my husband, brother, and I had spent much more than $21.99 on drinks the night before, because we were having fun. Why can't my kid have his fun, too?

????The hard truth is that unless I'm willing to impose austerity on all of us -- an austerity we have worked hard to avoid -- there is just no way to teach my kids the same flintiness that once manifested itself in my boiling chicken bones to make soup stock to save the $1.50 a can. If I now buy name brand Ziploc bags, my kids will learn to buy Ziploc bags, rather than the generic kind.

????But that's not all bad, because I'm not sure that my temperamental cheapness is as noble a trait, overall, as much personal finance literature makes it out to be. It has its upside: I've never had any debt beyond a mortgage. But it has its downsides, too. I give less generously than I would like, to charity and with gifts.

????I put off hiring as much childcare as we needed, because it was expensive, but that made it harder to build my career, and put a lot of strain on my marriage. I have been reluctant to invest in the business side of my work, by hiring assistants or paying for publicity, because I tell myself I could "save" money by doing it myself. Except then it gets done badly or (more often) doesn't get done.

????I want to teach my children that frugality is not a virtue in its own right, divorced from any larger goal. Money is powerful not because of anything inherent in these numbers, but because of what it can do. Sometimes we have to take risks, and sometimes we should invest in things that matter.

????That can include the happiness of our children. I'm not sure what forces will shape the economy they'll eventually work in. You have to plan for the future, but if the future is unknowable, there is something to be said for enjoying today as well. I'm trying to figure out the right balance between squirreling and profligacy -- that magic point where money is stripped of the drama, and becomes a tool for building the lives we want. Too bad that's hard to teach in the toy aisle.

????Laura Vanderkam is a regular contributor to Fortune.com and the author of All the Money in the World: What the Happiest People Know About Getting and Spending, out this week.