????我們可以鼓勵(lì)女性積極投身社會(huì)并張開(kāi)雙臂歡迎她們，但這并不會(huì)消除各種文化中一些已經(jīng)傳承千年的、對(duì)待女性的做法，它們一直強(qiáng)化著女性主要作為撫育者的角色（我指的并不只是養(yǎng)育孩子）。要克服這一點(diǎn)，就需要全世界有意識(shí)地持續(xù)努力。它在實(shí)踐中意味著什么呢？主要是以下幾點(diǎn)：

????? 男性支持這種觀點(diǎn)，即他們的女性另一半有能力作為平等的合伙人作出經(jīng)濟(jì)上的貢獻(xiàn)，有能力養(yǎng)家糊口。

????? 把要不要孩子的選擇權(quán)真正還給女性。這就要求消除對(duì)那些選擇不要孩子的女性的非議，讓她們真正獲得生育的選擇權(quán)。

????? 把是否照顧年邁雙親的選擇權(quán)還給女性。女性相對(duì)長(zhǎng)壽，經(jīng)濟(jì)壓力也較大，這意味著她們往往不得不照顧年邁的雙親和公婆。

????? 對(duì)那些選擇要孩子及照顧家里老人的女性提供社會(huì)和經(jīng)濟(jì)支持，這需要各類(lèi)企業(yè)和政府幫一把。

????從理論上來(lái)說(shuō)，上述情況現(xiàn)在都存在。我之所以說(shuō)是理論上，是因?yàn)槿绻鼈兇_實(shí)存在，我們?yōu)槭裁催€要對(duì)女性中沒(méi)能涌現(xiàn)出馬克、斯蒂夫、杰夫和埃隆這樣充滿創(chuàng)意的財(cái)富創(chuàng)造者大惑不解呢？請(qǐng)告訴我，如果整個(gè)社會(huì)對(duì)待女性的心態(tài)一直沒(méi)有改變，這怎么可能呢？！

????不過(guò)，盡管現(xiàn)實(shí)中女孩和婦女聽(tīng)到的說(shuō)法各有不同，但我還是要不揣冒昧地說(shuō)，只有女孩和婦女才會(huì)真正明白下面這番話的深意，因?yàn)樗齻儚那嗌倌觊_(kāi)始直到長(zhǎng)大成人，每天都會(huì)聽(tīng)到這話：“到了年紀(jì)就找個(gè)合適的伴侶，因?yàn)槲覀償[脫不了生理規(guī)律，給家庭賺錢(qián)的同時(shí)，也要養(yǎng)好孩子。”而根據(jù)所處文化背景的不同還會(huì)加上這么一句：“同時(shí)也別忘了對(duì)老爸老媽和公婆的責(zé)任啊。”

????我還要不揣冒昧地說(shuō)，有些人（不是所有人）會(huì)一直把這類(lèi)說(shuō)法掛在嘴邊，四處嘮叨。她們往往是些上了點(diǎn)年紀(jì)的婦女，可悲的是，其中還包括我們自己的母親！我說(shuō)這話不是想要指責(zé)誰(shuí)，只是要指明我們這一生所要面對(duì)的到底是什么樣的人和事。

????這就是讓女性在養(yǎng)大成人和投身社會(huì)過(guò)程中總是尋求穩(wěn)定而不是風(fēng)險(xiǎn)的諸多因素之一。一開(kāi)始就選擇工程學(xué)（這是大學(xué)里的小眾學(xué)科）然后開(kāi)始創(chuàng)業(yè)（這意味著收入不穩(wěn)定），這本身就是有風(fēng)險(xiǎn)的。選擇這條充滿風(fēng)險(xiǎn)的道路說(shuō)明我們是異類(lèi)（這不算什么壞事）。其他人則在一邊待著，看著我們會(huì)如何克服各種艱難險(xiǎn)阻。如果沒(méi)能打造一個(gè)價(jià)值十億美元的公司，也沒(méi)研發(fā)出什么創(chuàng)新技術(shù)，會(huì)不會(huì)有人對(duì)我們指指點(diǎn)點(diǎn)？我們會(huì)不會(huì)覺(jué)得自己痛失了做個(gè)好媽媽的機(jī)會(huì)？又或者我們有能耐做到家庭事業(yè)兩不誤嗎？

????而與此同時(shí)，男人全力以赴地干事業(yè)卻仍是這個(gè)社會(huì)可以接受的做法。

????We can encourage women to participate and welcome them with open arms, but that won't undo the thousands of years of ongoing cross-cultural practices that reinforce a woman's primary role as a nurturer (and I am not just talking about nurturing children). To overcome this requires a constant and vigilant effort globally. What does this mean in practice? It means the following:

????? Men supporting the notion that their female significant other can contribute as an equal partner financially or be the bread-winner of the household.

????? Really leaving the choice of having children up to women. This requires eradicating the unspoken judgment passed on women who choose not to have children and truly having the right to choice.

????? Really leaving the choice of taking care of elderly parents up to women. Longevity coupled with financial strain often mean that women are left to care for elderly parents and in-laws.

????? Having supportive social and economic practices for those who do chose to have children and take care of aging family members, which will need to be reinforced by somebody such as companies or governments.

????In theory, all of this exists today. I say in theory, because if they actually existed, why would we be still left wondering why women aren't more innovative wealth-creators a la Mark, Steve, Jeff, and Elon? Please tell me how this is possible without a sustained change in society's mindset towards women?!

????However, as status quo goes there is a mixed message being sent to girls and women, and I will take liberty in saying that only girls and women will truly understand this because they experience it daily from young through adolescence and into adulthood: "Find the right partner by a certain age, because we are still controlled by biology, and nurture your children while still contributing to the family financially." Depending on your cultural background add, "Please don't forget about your obligations to your aging parents and in-laws."

????I will also take liberty in saying that some, not all, but some people, who continue to reinforce and propagate this mixed message are an older generation of women, which sadly, often include our own mothers! I'm not saying it to place blame, but to merely point out who and what we face throughout our lives.

????This is one of the factors that has led females to being bred and socially conditioned to seek stability, not risk. There is an inherent risk involved in first choosing to pursue engineering (being the minority in college) and then entrepreneurship (being financially unstable). Those of us who have chosen a risky path are merely anomalies (not a bad thing). The rest are waiting and watching to see how we will overcome the personal risk we've taken. Will we be castigated if we fail to build a billion-dollar company and innovative technology? Or will we feel like we missed out on motherhood? Or will we be able to balance both?

????Meanwhile, it is still socially acceptable for men to focus wholeheartedly on their career.