????不懂感恩

????別人為你提供幫助的時(shí)候，向?qū)Ψ降呐Ρ硎靖兄x非常重要。當(dāng)然，你可以當(dāng)時(shí)就向?qū)Ψ奖磉_(dá)謝意，也可以把對(duì)方的好意記在心里，指導(dǎo)自己未來(lái)的行為。例如，你請(qǐng)求別人幫忙進(jìn)行社交推介，一定要讓聯(lián)系人知道最后的結(jié)果如何。不論你做什么，千萬(wàn)不能請(qǐng)求他人為你牽線搭橋，卻在安排初次會(huì)面的時(shí)候犯錯(cuò)誤。

????帕姆?索西在擔(dān)任蒙哥馬利郡教育委員會(huì)（Literacy Council of Montgomery County）常務(wù)主任時(shí)，一位下屬的朋友游說(shuō)她啟動(dòng)一個(gè)新項(xiàng)目。項(xiàng)目將由那位下屬的朋友負(fù)責(zé)。索西回憶說(shuō)：“我必須新增加一個(gè)崗位，還得想辦法解決這個(gè)崗位的工資問(wèn)題。她確實(shí)在非常賣力地推介，搞得我不得不申請(qǐng)?jiān)S可，還在原本就已經(jīng)很狹窄的辦公室里給她騰出了一塊地方。”

????然而，兩個(gè)月不到，那位員工就放棄了這份“夢(mèng)幻工作”。其實(shí)，早在幾個(gè)月之前，這個(gè)項(xiàng)目當(dāng)時(shí)還在籌備，而索西也還沒(méi)有同意為她專門(mén)設(shè)立一個(gè)崗位的時(shí)候，她就已經(jīng)有了這樣的打算。這就是忘恩負(fù)義。

????要尋找各種方式對(duì)同事的努力表示感謝，哪怕是通過(guò)一些間接的方法。高管教練米歇爾?弗里德曼就曾幫助一位客戶，將360度績(jī)效評(píng)估中的負(fù)面同級(jí)反饋?zhàn)兂蓚€(gè)人成長(zhǎng)和加深職場(chǎng)人際關(guān)系的一次機(jī)會(huì)。

????弗里德曼回憶稱：“她把同事的反饋看成一次機(jī)會(huì)，用來(lái)對(duì)同事說(shuō)：‘感謝你花時(shí)間填寫(xiě)調(diào)查表，提出意見(jiàn)。我認(rèn)真考慮過(guò)你說(shuō)的話，希望能與你交流一下如何讓我們的合作更加融洽。’”?

????Forgetting to say thank you

????When someone does you a favor, it's important to acknowledge the effort. Of course, you should thank the person at the moment, but also keep the favor in mind as a guide for your future behavior. For instance, if you ask for a networking introduction, be sure to let your contact know how it turns out. Whatever you do, don't ask for an introduction and then drop the ball in setting up an initial meeting.

????When Pam Saussy was executive director of the Literacy Council of Montgomery County, a friend of one of her employees lobbied for Saussy to launch a new program that the friend would run. "I had to create a position and figure out how to carve out some pay for it," Saussy recalls. "She really sold it hard, and I had to get permission and find a place for her in a tight office."

????Barely two months later, the employee quit to take her "dream job" at the State Department, a move that had been in the works for months -- long before Saussy agreed to create a position for her. Talk about ingratitude.

????Look for ways to appreciate your colleagues' efforts, even when it might not be obvious. Executive coach Michelle Friedman helped a client turn negative peer feedback from a 360-degree review into a chance for personal growth and deeper workplace relationships.

????"She used it as an opportunity to go back to them and say, 'Thank you for investing the time in filling out the survey and writing comments. I've thought about what you said, and I'd love to talk about ways we can work together better,' " recalls Friedman.