????戴維?庫(kù)爾茨在為自己現(xiàn)在的妻子瑞貝卡挑選訂婚戒指時(shí)，曾向“工作配偶”克里斯汀征求意見(jiàn)。他把照片發(fā)給她，向她請(qǐng)教戒指的款式，直到找到最完美的那一款。他與克里斯汀在一家科技初創(chuàng)公司共事，兩人共用一間辦公室，每天在一起“打配合”的時(shí)間有14個(gè)小時(shí)。庫(kù)爾茨追求瑞貝卡的整個(gè)過(guò)程中，克里斯汀一直在為他出謀劃策，包括篩選網(wǎng)上約會(huì)資料，編輯電子郵件，以及提供服裝建議等。

????來(lái)自洛杉磯的創(chuàng)業(yè)者庫(kù)爾茨說(shuō)道：“我清楚記得，我與我妻子第一次約會(huì)的時(shí)候，是她幫我打扮著裝。她來(lái)參加我的婚禮時(shí)，我在所有人面前感謝她：‘多虧了克里斯汀，我才沒(méi)把那次約會(huì)搞砸。’。”

????初創(chuàng)公司的工作環(huán)境處于高壓，這兩位似乎很自然地就成了親密的同事。克里斯汀已經(jīng)結(jié)婚，還有一個(gè)孩子，兩人從一開(kāi)始就不可能發(fā)生什么“浪漫的故事”。很快，庫(kù)爾茨就開(kāi)始替她取干洗的衣服，她也會(huì)幫庫(kù)爾茨去藥店買藥。

????這樣的關(guān)系讓工作充滿了樂(lè)趣，因?yàn)樗麄儗?duì)對(duì)方的項(xiàng)目會(huì)更感興趣，庫(kù)爾茨回憶道。而且，兩人對(duì)工作環(huán)境達(dá)成的共識(shí)讓他們可以非常輕松的討論想法或分享建議。他說(shuō)：“工作中，有人能夠理解你在說(shuō)什么，這一點(diǎn)非常可貴。你不可能總?cè)フ覑?ài)人或女朋友，讓她們理解你對(duì)工作的想法。”

當(dāng)工作與個(gè)人生活糾纏不清時(shí)

????芝加哥培訓(xùn)服務(wù)公司JB Training Solutions總裁、《經(jīng)理人3.0》（Manager 3.0）一書(shū)的作者布拉德?卡什表示，在許多行業(yè)，“工作配偶”現(xiàn)象是“每周7天，每天24小時(shí)”工作模式的必然產(chǎn)物。卡什說(shuō)：“人們會(huì)討論與工作配偶多年的關(guān)系。如果這種關(guān)系處理得當(dāng)，會(huì)非常完美。”如愛(ài)人般親密的同事關(guān)系在不同職務(wù)之間需要經(jīng)常配合的行業(yè)里更為常見(jiàn)。例如，在廣告業(yè)，文案團(tuán)隊(duì)與美工團(tuán)隊(duì)經(jīng)常數(shù)年甚至數(shù)十年一起密切合作，有時(shí)候甚至?xí)麄€(gè)團(tuán)隊(duì)一起跳槽到競(jìng)爭(zhēng)對(duì)手的公司。執(zhí)法合伙人之間也有類似的關(guān)系。寫(xiě)作拍檔茱莉亞?莫斯金與吉姆?西弗森在兩人合著的烹飪圖書(shū)《廚房大戰(zhàn)：2位廚師，12項(xiàng)挑戰(zhàn)，125份食譜，一場(chǎng)史詩(shī)般的廚房爭(zhēng)奪戰(zhàn)》（CookFight: 2 Cooks, 12 Challenges, 125 Recipes, an Epic Battle for Kitchen Dominance）稱呼彼此是“工作中的愛(ài)人”。書(shū)中按時(shí)間順序記錄了考驗(yàn)兩人友誼的烹飪挑戰(zhàn)。

????工作時(shí)與自己可以完全信任的比鄰而坐肯定有它的優(yōu)勢(shì)。這種親密的同事可以以一種工作之外的朋友或真正的配偶不可能有的方式，理解工作中出現(xiàn)的狀況和趣事。

????卡什說(shuō)：“這種關(guān)系可以讓你與一個(gè)信任的人分享自己的創(chuàng)意，或者向他征求意見(jiàn)。”他發(fā)現(xiàn)，凡是有“工作配偶”的人，在計(jì)劃跳槽去競(jìng)爭(zhēng)對(duì)手那里之前，會(huì)再三考慮，正是因?yàn)槭艿竭@種關(guān)系的影響。“同事是留住員工的無(wú)名英雄。”

????When David Kurtz was browsing for engagement rings for his now-wife Rebecca, he sought advice from his "work wife" Christine, texting her photos and consulting her on styles until he found the perfect art deco number. He and Christine shared an office at a tech startup, putting in 14-hour days and working closely with each other. Christine helped Kurtz every step of the way in his courtship of Rebecca, from screening online dating profiles to editing his emails and suggesting outfits.

????"I clearly remember her getting me dressed for my first dates with my wife," says Kurtz, a Los Angeles-based entrepreneur. "When she came to my wedding, I had to thank her in front of everybody, 'Christine helped me not screw this one up.' "

????It seemed natural for the two to become close at work, in a pressure-cooker startup environment. Christine was married with a child, and romance was off the table from the beginning. Before long, Kurtz was picking up her dry cleaning, and she was grabbing his prescriptions at the pharmacy.

????The relationship made work more fun, because they were more interested in each other's projects, Kurtz recalls, and their shared understanding of the work environment made it easy to discuss ideas or share advice. "It's of great value to have someone who knows what you're talking about," he says. "You can't always turn to your spouse or girlfriend and have them understand what you mean about work."

When work and personal lives blend

????The phenomenon of a "work spouse" is a natural outgrowth of the 24-7 work culture in many industries, says Brad Karsh, president of JB Training Solutions and author of Manager 3.0. "People talk about relationships they've had for years with their work spouse. If it's managed and handled appropriately, it's perfectly fine," Karsh says.

????Spouse-like partnerships at work are more common in industries where people with different job functions need to pair up frequently. In advertising, for instance, copywriter-art director teams might work closely together for years or even decades, sometimes leaving the same company to go to a competitor as a team. Law enforcement partners experience the same kind of bond. And writing partners Julia Moskin and Kim Severson refer to each other as "work wives" in their food book CookFight: 2 Cooks, 12 Challenges, 125 Recipes, an Epic Battle for Kitchen Dominance, which chronicles a cooking challenge that tested their friendship.

????Having someone you trust completely in the cubicle next door certainly has its advantages. That sort of close colleague may understand situations and anecdotes in a way your non-work friends or actual spouse may not.

????"It allows you to share and bounce ideas off somebody you trust," says Karsh, noting that someone with a work spouse may think twice before leaving that employer for a competitor because of the power of that relationship. "Coworkers are the unsung heroes of employee retention."