????這個話題到現(xiàn)在這已經是老生常談了：科技公司的董事會（或者任何公司董事會）中難覓女性影蹤；財富500強的首席執(zhí)行官中女性比例低于3%；女性收入只有男性的77%。沒錯，這些我們都聽說過了。職場一直都存在“女性問題”最近幾個月愈演愈烈。我們知道這樣一個鮮為人知的研究：有遠見的公司會吸收女性加入決策層，而這些公司往往擁有更好的盈利、更快樂的員工、更具社會責任意識。那很好，但在其它公司的女性狀況如何？你知道，并不是所有公司都會看重領導團隊的多元化。

????2008年我第一次作為分析師參加麥肯錫（McKinsey）的會議卻沒有發(fā)言。我保持沉默的原因是怕說錯話。我覺得自己沒什么可說的，我甚至不確定他人是否在意我的觀點。這種不安全感從何而來？

????女性在向權力頂峰攀登的過程中阻礙重重，而且這種阻礙不僅僅存在于最后幾級。希拉里?克林頓的前顧問安妮-瑪麗?斯勞特的文章《為何女人依舊無法內外兼顧》（Why Women Still Can't Have it All）所關注的女性覺得她們?yōu)榱顺杉抑挥袪奚殬I(yè)。當然，我目前只有26歲，不會假裝明白兼顧職業(yè)和下一代是什么感覺，但身為一個單親身業(yè)女性（更不用說她還是位社會學家）的女兒，我還是可以說我了解將來所要面臨的艱難選擇。最重要的是我明白，不要輕易評判其她女性的人生決定。斯勞特的文章和“女性空間”里的很多其她聲音也給出了補救措施，例如廣泛的社會變革，共同分擔養(yǎng)育子女的責任和靈活的時間安排等。

????這些建議把責任推給體制。如果這是個完美的世界，做到這一點就足夠了。但社會文化的改變其實就像冰川移動般緩慢。我們不能再自我欺騙，以為憑借幾位女性的大聲疾呼和猛烈攻擊就能迫使公司就范，就能讓更多女性獲得頂級職位。確實，看看我們如何改變自己所在的公司，這是往正確方向邁出的一步，但我們需要更多地與各行各業(yè)的職業(yè)女性展開合作性的對話。我們需要更專注于可行的方案和容易獲得的技能，如此，才能對抗阻礙女性向上爬升的制度偏見。

????泛泛而談事業(yè)和家庭的平衡當然是有益的，但它將一大批女性排除在了外面：單親母親、沒有子女的女性和剛剛開始職業(yè)生涯的女性（下一代還遠未提上議事日程）。我們應該更多地注重向女性提供全過程的職業(yè)戰(zhàn)略建議，這樣她們就能為成功做好準備。而它包括坦誠地探討成功和失敗的例子，拋開通常的虛偽外表，勇敢面對失敗。（沒有人十全十美。）

????It's a broken record at this point: the dearth of women on boards of tech companies (or on any boards for that matter); that less than 3% of Fortune 500 CEOs are women; that women make 77 cents to a man's dollar. Yes, we've heard. There are "Women's Issues" in the workplace, and they have taken a new turn in recent months. While less publicized, we know the research: Companies that are forward-thinking enough to include women in decision-making tend to flaunt better bottom lines, happier employees, and more socially-conscious businesses. That's all great, but what about women at the other companies? You know, the companies that aren't as focused on creating diverse leadership teams.

????In my first meeting as an analyst at McKinsey in 2008, I didn't speak. Afraid that I would sound stupid, I sat there quietly. I didn't believe that I had anything worthy to say, and I didn't know if anyone would care about my point of view. Where did this insecurity come from?

????Women face barriers when climbing to the top, but it's not always on those last few rungs. Former Hillary Clinton aide Anne-Marie Slaughter's article "Why Women Still Can't Have it All" focused on women who feel like they must bow out of their careers to start a family. While at 26 I can't pretend to know what it will be like to have a child and a career, I can say as the daughter of a working single mother (a sociologist to boot) I know I will face tough choices down the line. And most importantly I know the importance of not judging other women's life decisions. Slaughter's article and many other voices in this "women's space" suggest remedies like broad-based social change, 50/50 parenting, and flexible hours.

????All of those things place the responsibility on the institutions. In a perfect world, that would be enough. But cultural change often runs at a glacial pace. We need to stop pretending that getting more women to the top is going to magically happen by relying on several women asking for change and launching fiery attacks at companies that don't. Sure, it's a step in the right direction to look at how we change the institutions that employ us, but we need to shift toward collaborative conversations with businesswomen of all types. And we need to focus more on actionable solutions and skills that we can build to combat the institutional biases towards women's ascent to the top.

????The typical work-life conversations are helpful, but they exclude huge numbers of women: single mothers, those without children, and those just starting out their careers (with babies not even a blip on their radar). Focusing more on providing career strategies to women throughout their careers will set them up for success. That involves honestly discussing the approaches that work and those that fail -- beyond the usual veneer -- and without being ashamed of failure. (Nobody's perfect.)